Reading time: five minutes.
I’d like you to meet Kate.
Kate’s alarm goes at 6 am and her first thought is Seriously? But I’ve only slept a few hours, how am I going to cope today, of all days?
She’s made it into the kitchen, half awake, fully exhausted, wondering how on earth she’s going to manage that big meeting. Kate has already checked two news websites on her phone whilst waiting for the coffee to brew. ‘Nothing but misery in the world,’ she mutters. With her hot coffee, Kate sits down to answer just one email from her manager, and before she knows it a swig of cold coffee distracts her from someone’s post on Facebook.
Rushing to get ready for work,
Kate curses that she has no time anymore and wants this day done with, so she can relax. She begs for a good day at the office, but her body yearns to just crawl back under the bedcovers.
Does this ring any bells? I hear it all too often from clients. Constantly doing, sorting, organising, thinking, and making decisions about something, every minute of every day. They’re exhausted. Exhausted from being available all the time and having no me-moments in their busy lives. In this post, I want to share some of the tips I give them, to help combat the daily chaos, to feel more energised and in balance.
THE BASIC THINGS
First thing first: I assume you’ve been to your General Practitioner, to rule out any underlying physiological reasons for the tiredness?
Your tiredness could also be related to unhappiness on the work or home front, or traumatic and other stressful moments, so be conscious of that. Don’t underestimate how much energy the body uses in times of stress, even after the stress factors have settled. I’d advise you to reach out to a therapist if you need help processing that.
The obvious food, hydration, exercise and sleeping needs have to be mentioned here. Not everyone needs the same amount of sleep, and most people don’t have a choice in how many hours they get each night. If you’re able to change that I encourage you to experiment, to find your optimum level. Try keeping a sleep diary, so you can document how many hours are best for you. I know people who need ten-plus hours each night and others who survive on far less.
Have you got enough diversity in your day? Is your daytime schedule monotonous, maybe even soul-sucking? Well, that’s a whole blog post right there on its own, but let’s say, doing something different for a change at work and at regular intervals is very beneficial. Desk job workers benefit immensely from walking regularly, preferably outside. Those who are running around nonstop at work should just sit outside, to help regain that energetic balance. The point is just getting out of your (probably) indoor space, and refilling your energetic cup by moving, and preferably being outdoors is super beneficial. Just a few minutes may seem insignificant at the time, but I promise it will refresh you.
THE DIGITAL THINGS
Keeping up with everything around you, being pushed to consume information, panicking slightly if you miss a single post or podcast episode, or a new bit of news despite having heard the report every hour all day long. It’s all well and good, but you could just ask yourself how much information you really need. Will your day be that much better or different if you read about X or listen to Y?
I’m inviting you to look at your behaviour patterns, I know it’s hard when we have to look at ourselves in the proverbial mirror, but quite often that’s the best place to start. I ask clients to do this exercise, for a month at least, preferably three months, to make a conscious effort to be more offline.
Make a conscious effort to batch your online stuff. So think about emails, ordering stuff, and social media accounts if you use them, and make one moment in your day to deal with all that stuff.
Set a timer for how long you think you need to be online, and make sure you stick to it. This can be quite daunting seeing how engrained a mobile phone has become in our lives. But, if you don’t do this exercise wholeheartedly then it’s just yourself you're letting down, which isn’t going to help your tiredness. Just choose the length of time that best fits your schedule.
No online stuff after 8 p.m. Tomorrow is another day, and unless your life or someone else’s depends on it, then stick to it. This one is a must for those who have sleeping issues. Try and do something easy on the eyes (and brain) before bedtime.
No online time before you’re fully awake, dressed and ready to start your day, and then remembering to batch it!
Press mute! Restrict or reduce the excess information you're absorbing throughout your day. Think of advertising, be it on the radio, on the TV, or in those moments when you're online. Turn the background noise off.
THE HEALING THINGS
Working with complementary therapies and other systems is an essential part of my daily living, and has been for as long as I can remember. I couldn’t imagine my life without it now. This is also a whole other blog post subject on its own, so I’ll try and keep it brief here. Working with crystals and other grounding techniques, meditation, yoga, walking, taking care of something (indoor and outdoor gardening), and other acts of quietening the mind will lift your energetic level the most.
Start bringing small me-moments into your busy day, preferably three to five moments, even if that means staying in the toilet area at work, behind a closed door for a moment. Don’t laugh, I promise you’ll feel better.
Do more of what makes you happy, in the form of me-time (longer me-moments). Another common irritation from clients is not having time just for themselves, always putting other people's needs before their own. I’m a strong believer in filling your own cup and making it a priority, so I encourage them to get back to doing the thing that brings them joy and making sure it gets planned into their weekly schedule. By carving out time and making it a date with themselves they’re showing that they’re committed to it. So often my clients say they wanted to do this and that but then something came up every time, and their me-time disappeared into the background again. Also, the act of planning will eliminate any guilt blocks around ‘taking time off’ in a busy schedule, allowing you to relax and enjoy more.
Do something to amp up the good vibrations at home. Spray fragrances, ring bells, use aroma oils or incense in your living space, dance, sing, or play uplifting music. Whatever works for you, just get that energy moving in an upward direction in your home.
Of course, I’m going to say read more, I’m a writer. But the act of reading and immersing yourself in someone else’s story is so healing. If audiobooks are more your thing then make time to just sit and be told a story. If you’re new to reading or returning then build it up slowly. Most people give up because they think it requires too much attention when quite often they just haven’t found the right reading material to sweep them away, so read something that appeals to you. Check out your local library, bookshop, or goodreads.com for inspiration.
Journaling can be beneficial for a multitude of reasons. Don't like writing? Then type it, or speak it into a voice memo or other recording device. The point is to get it off your chest.
To finish, I recommend telling family members what you’re doing, have a sit down with them and see if others are also fed up energetically. Maybe turn it into a family effort. Whether or not they join in be sure to give them your rules and boundaries, and state that you’d like them to respect that.
In essence, the answers to feeling more energised and in balance are easy and readily available. Having to implement them and stick to the plan, as much as possible, that’s the hard part, and the question is are you willing to do that for yourself? Start small, and build on that. You can do this!
I came across a fitting quote years ago, maybe it resonates with you?
“It doesn’t matter how much you sleep if it’s your soul that’s tired.”
I want to thank you for your time in reading this, I hope some things resonated with you and you can implement them into your daily life. I’d love to hear what works for you, so just reach out and email me, or leave a comment below.
Blessings,
Yvonne Martha x